The Karate Undergrond

[stevenpiziks]

Today at karate class we practiced side jump kicks, which involve leaping straight up and lashing out sideways with one foot.  They generate tremendous force, and most of the time, I knocked the punching bag over. This slowed the practice--jump, kick, knock the bag over, stop, walk around the bag, haul it upright, get back in line.

After a while, the instructor switched us to flying side kicks.  This is one of the flashier martial arts moves.  You leap sideways toward the bag and lash out with your foremost foot.  WHACK!  Your target takes considerable damage and you look massively cool in the process.  I was gearing up to try it when the instructor took me aside.

"Adults," she said, "aren't allowed to perform this kick."

"Oh?  Why not?" I asked, a little startled.

"Too great a chance for injury.  You can really hurt your knee.  The official policy is that adults aren't supposed to do this kick.  Of course, the instructor can't always see what everyone is doing all the time."

Ah.  I had been inducted into the karate underground, the secret society consisting of forbidden moves and secret forms.  If I was caught or injured, the karate school would disavow any and all knowledge of my presence.

Flying side kicks are great fun, but for a full-grown adult male, they =always= knock the bag over.  Many of the kids were able to knock them over, or at least seriously rock them.