stevenpiziks (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
stevenpiziks) wrote2019-12-08 07:51 pm
stevenpiziks) wrote2019-12-08 07:51 pm
Albion: The Desk from Hell
So, the Desk from Hell:
See, we'd gone to Staples and found a small, inexpensive desk for me to use in the Albion house. I'm getting a desk there because with summers and holiday breaks, I'll probably spend more time in Albion than Darwin spends in Wherever, and I need a desk to write on. The desk in question had a keyboard drawer and some side drawers and it was just the right size. So we ordered.
When the desk arrived in Albion, we discovered two things. First, it was packed in that nasty-ass styrofoam that breaks into fluffy little beads that cling to everything everywhere. Second, it was in literally hundreds and hundreds of pieces. If we'd known it was like this, we wouldn't have ordered it. But here it was. Sighing, we got to work.
It took nearly four fucking frustrating hours. We wrestled with badly-done instructions and poorly-labeled hardware and tried not to get short with each other. And in the end, the keyboard drawer didn't line up quite right and wouldn't close properly. (Has anyone ever assembled a desk on which the keyboard drawer worked?) I finally said, "Screw it," and pulled the keyboard drawer off. Now it's a desk with an open space in the front, and it looks fine.
After that, we went downstairs to tackle the lamps. The house's ceiling lights don't illuminate everything, so I had bought a bunch of basic floor lamps from Ikea. It was the very last thing we needed to do. After the desk debacle, Darwin was wary.
"How hard are these to put together?" he asked.
"Easy," I reassured him. "When you moved and took some of the table lights with you, I bought some of these, and it took me maybe a minute to put each one together."
I reached for the first box on the pile, opened it–
--and found the silverware.
The silverware, along with a couple-three other kitchen things, had been packed in an Ikea lamp box after I'd bought floor lamps for Wherever, and the old box had gotten lumped in with the new lamps. The silverware had been sitting in dining room the entire time!
The lamps were simple, as advertised, and now we had silverware. At last!
So now the Albion house looks nice and is all moved in.
Except for the office. Darwin still hasn't unpacked the office.
See, we'd gone to Staples and found a small, inexpensive desk for me to use in the Albion house. I'm getting a desk there because with summers and holiday breaks, I'll probably spend more time in Albion than Darwin spends in Wherever, and I need a desk to write on. The desk in question had a keyboard drawer and some side drawers and it was just the right size. So we ordered.
When the desk arrived in Albion, we discovered two things. First, it was packed in that nasty-ass styrofoam that breaks into fluffy little beads that cling to everything everywhere. Second, it was in literally hundreds and hundreds of pieces. If we'd known it was like this, we wouldn't have ordered it. But here it was. Sighing, we got to work.
It took nearly four fucking frustrating hours. We wrestled with badly-done instructions and poorly-labeled hardware and tried not to get short with each other. And in the end, the keyboard drawer didn't line up quite right and wouldn't close properly. (Has anyone ever assembled a desk on which the keyboard drawer worked?) I finally said, "Screw it," and pulled the keyboard drawer off. Now it's a desk with an open space in the front, and it looks fine.
After that, we went downstairs to tackle the lamps. The house's ceiling lights don't illuminate everything, so I had bought a bunch of basic floor lamps from Ikea. It was the very last thing we needed to do. After the desk debacle, Darwin was wary.
"How hard are these to put together?" he asked.
"Easy," I reassured him. "When you moved and took some of the table lights with you, I bought some of these, and it took me maybe a minute to put each one together."
I reached for the first box on the pile, opened it–
--and found the silverware.
The silverware, along with a couple-three other kitchen things, had been packed in an Ikea lamp box after I'd bought floor lamps for Wherever, and the old box had gotten lumped in with the new lamps. The silverware had been sitting in dining room the entire time!
The lamps were simple, as advertised, and now we had silverware. At last!
So now the Albion house looks nice and is all moved in.
Except for the office. Darwin still hasn't unpacked the office.
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do not put Mr Fork into the light socket..
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