stevenpiziks (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
stevenpiziks) wrote2020-12-19 10:00 pm
stevenpiziks) wrote2020-12-19 10:00 pm
Dashing in December
In recent years, Hallmark (or Hallmark-style) Christmas movies have wormed their way into American holiday tradition. Their official name is "romantic holiday drama film," and Hallmark floods the network with them. They're universally awful--mediocre acting, cringeworthy dialogue, utterly unbelievable stories, unrealistic characters. The sets all look fake. And the story is ALWAYS exactly the same: Person A returns to their childhood home for the holidays and encounters a family problem (usually the upcoming loss of a family business). Person A also meets Person B. The two of them dislike each other, but while trying to solve the family problem, they fall in love. Also, at least one person dislikes Christmas. Person A and Person B have a fight at some point, and they split up, then, thanks to the intervention of a Wise Older Person, they realize their mistake and get back together. The family business is rescued. The Christmas-hating person learns to love Christmas. Person A decides to give up their career and instead stay home to run the business with Person B. Roll credits.
I can't watch these films, even if I remind myself that everyone EXPECTS them to be schlocky and awful. The writing is just too terrible. Also, Person A and Person B are always straight. No real LGBT representation. Very occasionally we'll get a Gay Best Friend, but he never has any real consequence, and there's no on-screen romance with this character. Hallmark did put out a film with a gay couple in it (THE CHRISTMAS HOUSE), but the gay couple weren't main characters; they were part of much larger ensemble cast. It's a step forward, I suppose, but a timid one, and not worth my time. So I avoided these awful things.
Until...
This year, Paramount (not Hallmark) put out a "romantic holiday drama film" called DASHING IN DECEMBER. And at its center are two gay men. They are the main characters, front and center, and clearly so.
I decided to watch it.
It was AWFUL. Every moment was dreadful. The guys were handsome, but the schlock dripped from the screen. It hit all the plot points I mentioned above, and was so predictable that I was able to call out the dialogue a moment ahead of the speaking character. As a bonus, we even had a straight female friend become angry at a gay character, not because he was gay, but because he didn't come out to her the way she wanted her to. (I've ranted about this awful trope elsewhere.) Terrible in every way that these movies are terrible.
And it was AWESOME.
Not because the movie was good. It wasn't. It was awesome because we have a holiday TV tradition that has INCLUDED US. Everyone else got schlocky Christmas movies, but not LGBT people. Now we have one, too. Just like everyone else.
To put it into perspective, imagine your mother knits, and every year at the annual family gathering, she gives everyone one of these sweaters--except you. Everyone puts on their sweaters and laughs about them and parades around in them. But not you. Mom disapproves of you, so she ignores you. You don't particularly WANT an ugly sweater, but when everyone else gets one, you are made to feel the outsider. At dinner, everyone talks about the sweaters and how sweet it is that Mom made them this year, even though they're awful and ugly. She makes them because she loves everyone. Except you. So you watch all the laughter and all the love from a distance. But then, one year, Mom has a change of heart, and you get an ugly sweater of your own. You get to participate in the tradition with everyone else. It's not the sweater that's important--it's being included.
The movies are a cringe-y tradition, but they're a tradition, and now they're a tradition that includes US. So thank you, schlocky Christmas movies! Please make more!
I can't watch these films, even if I remind myself that everyone EXPECTS them to be schlocky and awful. The writing is just too terrible. Also, Person A and Person B are always straight. No real LGBT representation. Very occasionally we'll get a Gay Best Friend, but he never has any real consequence, and there's no on-screen romance with this character. Hallmark did put out a film with a gay couple in it (THE CHRISTMAS HOUSE), but the gay couple weren't main characters; they were part of much larger ensemble cast. It's a step forward, I suppose, but a timid one, and not worth my time. So I avoided these awful things.
Until...
This year, Paramount (not Hallmark) put out a "romantic holiday drama film" called DASHING IN DECEMBER. And at its center are two gay men. They are the main characters, front and center, and clearly so.
I decided to watch it.
It was AWFUL. Every moment was dreadful. The guys were handsome, but the schlock dripped from the screen. It hit all the plot points I mentioned above, and was so predictable that I was able to call out the dialogue a moment ahead of the speaking character. As a bonus, we even had a straight female friend become angry at a gay character, not because he was gay, but because he didn't come out to her the way she wanted her to. (I've ranted about this awful trope elsewhere.) Terrible in every way that these movies are terrible.
And it was AWESOME.
Not because the movie was good. It wasn't. It was awesome because we have a holiday TV tradition that has INCLUDED US. Everyone else got schlocky Christmas movies, but not LGBT people. Now we have one, too. Just like everyone else.
To put it into perspective, imagine your mother knits, and every year at the annual family gathering, she gives everyone one of these sweaters--except you. Everyone puts on their sweaters and laughs about them and parades around in them. But not you. Mom disapproves of you, so she ignores you. You don't particularly WANT an ugly sweater, but when everyone else gets one, you are made to feel the outsider. At dinner, everyone talks about the sweaters and how sweet it is that Mom made them this year, even though they're awful and ugly. She makes them because she loves everyone. Except you. So you watch all the laughter and all the love from a distance. But then, one year, Mom has a change of heart, and you get an ugly sweater of your own. You get to participate in the tradition with everyone else. It's not the sweater that's important--it's being included.
The movies are a cringe-y tradition, but they're a tradition, and now they're a tradition that includes US. So thank you, schlocky Christmas movies! Please make more!