Let's Get One Thing Straight

Dear Grocery Stores:

 

I hate grocery shopping.  No, that's not strong enough.  I =loathe= grocery shopping.  As a result, I get really picky about the crap you try to pull.  Let's get a few things straight, here.

 

First, the "cart buster" slogan is truly stupid.  Not only is it hopelessly hyperbolic, it sounds like a problem a grossly obese person trundles down the aisles.  It's certainly not something I want to associate myself with.

 

Second, please don't tell me I'm "saving money" at your store.  I'm not.  You are a retail establishment, not a bank.  I =spend= money there; I don't save anything.  I =may= spend a little less if you put something on sale, but since the difference doesn't go into a special savings account, I'm not saving anything.

 

Third, I shop with a calculator, and I read the labels.  So knock off the stupid "3 for $2.50" and "8 for $7" crap.  I know you're trying to hide the price for an individual piece, and I know you're secretly hoping I'll buy 3 or 8 and bust my cart.  I won't, and your idiotic attempts at obfuscation only make me want to buy less, not more.

 

Fourth, any product that appears on a little ad on my cart goes straight onto my "I'm not buying it" list, no matter how much I need it.

 

Finally, I'm really tired of watching you raise the price of a product and then putting it "on sale" at a slightly higher price than it was last week and then informing me that I'm saving money by buying it.  It's all a trick, I know it's a trick, and I'm not falling for it.  Just raise the damn price to the sale price and leave it at that.  We know prices go up sometimes.  It's also painfully obvious that the products you have on permanent sale are just there to rack up the so-called savings.

 

I'm not stupid, and I get very tired of being treated like I am.