No Donations

Today I went through my closet.  I've lost considerable weight, you see, and a bunch of my clothes no longer fit. Some clothes I just don't wear anymore.  We also have sheets and blankets we don't need.  I put piles and piles of clothes and linens into bags, and Darwin helped me schlep them down to the car.

We drove to a charity thrift store up the road from us. Their parking lot was blocked off with parking cones. A big sign posted in their parking lot said in stern letters NO DONATIONS!

So Darwin and I drove to another place.  Another stern sign: NO DONATIONS!

In the end, we just threw everything out.

I actually have a theory about this.

When I was young, there used to be charity clothes drives, especially at the holidays. You were urged to donate used clothes. "We need them! Please go through your closets and drawers. Families are in need!"  But relatively few people donated clothes.  Donating clothes was something the wealthy did.  If you had clothes worth re-using, you didn't donate them--you held a garage sale and sold them.

Nowadays?  Donation stores are drowning in donations.  Why?  Look at the clothes themselves.  Manufacturing methods have changed.  Shirts are made of fabric so thin, you can see through it.  Machines do a lot more cutting and sewing work than ever before.  And, of course, the workers are paid next to nothing.  This makes clothing less expensive for the consumer, but it's also shoddy, cheap-ass stuff. 

I was clothing shopping yesterday, hunting for new shirts that fit the new me.  I was especially hunting for warm shirts and decent fleeces because my classroom is cold in winter.  But all the fleeces I found were thin, barely above t-shirt thickness.  Same for gingham shirts. They were like tissue paper. 

Women complain about this phenomenon, especially. Women's clothing seems designed to fall apart after it goes through the wash a couple times, and to be so thin that it won't keep you warm.  The clothing companies seem to think we all live in Arizona.  But of course, it's that they're trying to lower manufacturing costs.

Since clothes cost less and wear out faster, people buy more of them. This leads to overstuffed closets, which further leads to a glut of donations. 

So now the dumpster in our complex is half-full of clothes.

Pride Flag Update

The fight over our flag has continued.

It started when we flew a Pride flag from our balcony. A couple-three weeks later, we got a notice from the management company of our condo that said our flag was a violation of the rules and regulations. I pointed out to the company that the rules and regs only regulate American flags. Other flags, including Pride flags, were not mentioned.

We knew that our neighbor J---, who is also the HOA vice-president, was unhappy that our second-story flag was flying higher than his first-story American flag. And he's generally homophobic anyway.  He filed the initial complaint.

This touched off an explosive fight, mostly via email.  A couple days into the whole affair, J--- was standing down on the boat dock a few yards away from the condo balconies. He was talking loudly to another neighbor, and he told her that HIS flag stood for patriotism and THAT flag stood for a sexual preference, and they were going to change the rules to forbid THAT flag.  I wrote it all down.

Darwin and I got really pissed.  J--- is allowed to be as homophobic as he likes in private life, but in this case, he was clearly speaking as a member of the HOA board, and he was making hate speech against a fellow co-owner.

The board met--without informing anyone else that they were doing so--and apparently they voted in a new flag rule, one that forbade all flags except the American flag.  We were served notice from the HOA's lawyer that we had to take our flag down immediately.

We shot back that both the original flag rule and the new flag rule stated American flags must be flown according to the US Flag Code, which, among other things, states that flags may not be flown if they are worn or torn and that at night they must be taken down or lighted.  The new rule also stated that all flags must be 4'x6'.  But several residents were flying worn American flags, didn't take them down at night or light them, and flew a whole bunch of smaller flags on their boats and balconies, and no one filed complaints about that. We were being singled out over our sexual orientation.

We also pointed out that the rules and regs clearly state that anyone accused of a violation can call for a board hearing, and we were officially calling for one. In the meantime, though, we took the flag down.

After a whole bunch of angry back-and-forth via email, R--, the HOA president, and K---, a board member, asked if we could meet informally to talk about the matter.  We agreed, and the four of us met near the kitten shed.  It was a long, sometimes angry, talk. I told them what J-- had said, and Darwin pointed out that the board wasn't being fair and evenhanded in enforcing the rules. I also said that the board had the power to change the rule at any time. Would R-- ask the board to do so?

R-- dismissed J--'s hate speech with a, "He's old school Baptist, and it's just the way he is" and said he had no intention of asking the board to change the rule.

A few days later, I put the flag back up.

Within an hour, I got an irate text from R--. "I thought we'd resolved this," he said.

"We haven't had our hearing yet," I shot back.  "In the interest of convenience, we're willing to wait until the next board meeting."

That was a week ago.  We haven't heard a word since.  The Pride flag continues to fly.

I'm wondering if the board is sick of dealing with the time and expense. (Every time they consult with the attorney, it costs money--and they've consulted with him a LOT.)  Have they decided just to drop the matter?  We'll see.